Learning How To Be A Boy

This seems like something that should be instinctual (tooting/sword fighting/scratching), but apparently it isn't.

I remember reading in Bringing Up Boys by James Dobson that boys identify with a male role model at several developmental stages - the first was as early as 18 months. He said that boys actually have to learn to how be men and that their role model defines masculine behavior for them.

In the last month or two, it seems as though Ben is going through one of these stages. He has really attached himself to Chuck and has kind of become his shadow. If watching Chuck tells Ben what men are supposed to do, then Ben is currently learning that men mow the grass and wash cars.

This spring, Ben has been standing at the window while Chuck mows. He watches him mow the entire yard. I'm talking standing at a window, watching someone walk back and forth, mowing for a solid hour. I would consider this torture, and can't believe this is the same kid who thinks it takes too long to put pants on before going outside to play.

Chuck said I could let Ben outside while he was mowing. (I don't know why I didn't before. Maybe I thought he'd bark and bite at the mower.) Ben was in heaven. He marched proudly right behind Chuck, walking in perfectly straight little lines, going all the way to the fence before turning. Then he got his toy mower and just followed after Dad shouting.


Bean mow! Daddy MOW!

 When we tell him the yard looks nice, he says, "Yeah! Bean mow!"

Chuck is being so sweet and supportive with the birth of our daughter and has taken two weeks off. He's spending a lot of quality time with Ben and trying to get a few little extras done around the house - specifically, giving the cars a thorough cleaning.

Yesterday, he and Ben cleaned his car:

Wash. Rinse. Repeat. The tricky part is knowing when to stop washing. Chuck is very particular about water spots, in fact, you could say that water spots are his arch enemy. So, he towel dries the car after washing it. I watched him feverishly drying the driver's side as Ben "rewashed" the passenger side he'd just dried.

Toddlers need really clear instructions, "Now it's time to dry the car. Here's a towel. You do it." They also need water confiscated.

In any case, it looks like Ben is well on his way to learning the ins-and-outs of being a boy... or at least outdoor chores.